for the love of vogs

where the MotleyFlue gather


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FlueBalls

A few weeks ago, I introduced you to the elusive Fluegasm. Today, I introduce you to a related condition: FlueBalls. Here you go….

FlueBalls: a temporary state of pain and frustration that is caused by denying oneself from the joy of Fluevogs. Temporary numbness followed by acute pain in the lower extremities of the body may ensue. Other symptoms of FlueBalls include: (1) random yelling of swear words (2) occasional furniture throwing (3) binge chocolate eating (4) frequent after-hours visits to your local Fluevog store to gaze at the display window (5) obsessive Fluevog site stalking (6) vehement declarations of the selfishness rich people (Seriously, Mr. Trump?! You have $5 million to spare for the president’s college records,  but you can’t throw a few hundred dollars my way for a delicious pair of Fluevogs? Believe me, my happiness is a worthy cause…. It’s okay. I’d hate for my collection to be tainted by Trump $$ anyway. heh.) (7) and many, many more violent acts of craziness. This condition is universally experienced by all who long for a delicious pair of Fluevogs, yet choose to deny themselves of such pleasure.

The only known cure to FlueBalls is to purchase your desired pair. Once said pair is purchased (or put on layaway), the heavens open, angels sing, and a cute puppy finds a loving home.

If alleviating FlueBalls isn’t enough to convince you to get a pair, then please, do it for the puppies!

Cure your FlueBalls and save a puppy.
This image was island-style borrowed from here:
http://nickstraffictricks.com/3300_free-one-way-dofollow-backlinks/.

Happy Holidays from the MotleyFlue!

Living life feet first.

j-ro

*Okay. Maybe we can’t guarantee that a puppy will find a home. But we are pretty certain that good things will happen if you cure your FlueBalls.


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oh Ralphie!

Hello Hotcakes! Warning: If you don’t like attention, please don’t bother wearing these beauties.

Here’s the story of when j-ro met the Hotcakes…. I saw these online and immediately fell in love. I have hearty calves and unfortunately, Mr. Fluevog  doesn’t make boots that fit a thicker leg. Confession: my wallet is thankful. It means less Vogs to consider. Anyway… when I saw these, I couldn’t wait ’til they finally hit the stores!

The Manpanion and I headed over to Haight Street and Allan ended up helping me. I explained my large calf issue. He asked if I had tried the Sugars. I told him that I did, during a trip to L.A. and it was a complete failure. My calves are so big that there isn’t enough lacing to reach all the way to the top.  Since Allan’s special Boo has the same calf issue, he says that he’s the go-to guy if you need advice on knee-high boots for large calves. (Btw, I met Allan’s special Boo this weekend. She is, indeed, lovely!)

During that trip, I tried on the Hotcakes in a size 9. They fit PERFECTLY! I loved that they really defined by calves and they were comfy too! I had only tried them on one leg because I didn’t want to trouble the dealer any more than I already had (I knew I wasn’t going to buy them yet. That visit was a “try it on” trip.) I wobbled around to look at the Hotcakes in the mirror. Out of nowhere, the Manpanion rose from his “king’s” chair and grabbed my shoulder. I turned and he asked me to stop wobbling. He then reached over to caress my leg. I thought it was weird. Then, Allan turned to him and they both shared a “guy” moment. Allen then told the Manpanion, “I know what you mean. I like nice calves too.” The scenario made me laugh and it reminded me of A Christmas Story. Do you remember when the father wins the leg lamp and Ralphie starts groping the leg? In case you forgot, look at the video below, specifically at 1:39 and 3:48. You’ll get the picture:)

Recently, I explained what a Fluegasm is. I forgot to mention that the people around you can have a Fluegasmic moment too – at least that’s what I’d say the Manpanion had when he pulled the Ralphie on me. I should ammend my original post by stating that. Admittedly, the Manpanion’s reaction totally sealed the deal for me. I invested in the Hotcakes for his Fluegasm, not mine;P

Since the Hotcakes cost a pretty penny, I needed to figure out a good Flue-nancial plan. Within a month, I was back and I put those babies on layaway! It took a while to pay off, but they have and continue to be well worth the investment. I’ve been stared at and stopped randomly on the street because of these Vogs. For those of you who are contemplating the Hotcakes, I say DO IT! (Yeah Marisol, I’m talking to YOU!) You’ll be happy you did:)

Living life feet first.

j-ro


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Fluegasms.

Be still my beating heart. These 40th anniversary re-issues captured me. I had a dream about them and that week, I decided to get them. Truly Fluegasm-worthy.

In Shirley’s bio, she mentions that when Vog shopping, if she runs into a pair that ignites a Fluegasm, it’s fate’s way to saying she needs to get the shoe. That excitement is better than any shoegasm a gal could have. It’s a Fluegasm. In case you’re wondering, a Fluegasm is as follows:

Fluegasm: the most intense point during Fluevog shopping/browsing excitement. Such excitement is characterized by: (1) extremely pleasurable sensations pulsating through one’s body while experiencing Fluevogs (2) the inherent need to jump, dance, and prance around after discovering yet another amazing pair of shoes (3) at the highest point of violently intense elation, one decides to indeed, go home with a new pair (or two) of shoes.

Don’t take my word for it. Have you tried on a pair of Fluevogs lately?


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My first pair of Fluevogs

Ummm, that’s alotta skin vibin’ with a mini skirt

I, the Artful Voger (aka The Agent), CLAIM to be the pickiest of the MotleyFlue. BUT I wanted my inaugural post to be about my first pair of Fluevogs. In any case, my first pair of Vogs was, well, FAR from a practical purchase. The first and last time I wore these gems was in this picture. Now, my mother would hate these saucy booties because, let’s face it, people don’t imagine me wearing the Vibes and talking about post-structuralist theory and researching scopic regimes at the library. They picture other things like grocery shopping, you know?

So, dear reader, Generalissima really (really) wants me to wear these shoes. Naturally, whatever Generalissima suggests (voluntells me) to do, it’s for my own fabulous good. Quitey honestly, I love them. But only wear them around the house when I feel like shit (just being honest). The Vibes are like jewelry (you never feel bloated when you throw on your favorite earrings or necklace). Yet, I have not found an occasion to fiercely wear them. I know, I know…total shame, right? In any case, here’s a task for you…come up with an outfit for me. Make some suggestions and I’ll pick my favorite ones and go vintage shopping (or dig through my closet).

You’re probably thinking, “Out of your collection, which Fluvogs do you wear constantly?” Easy answer. My Wickeds from the Thanks family. Mini testimonial: 12 hours of walking around Manhattan and Brooklyn for a week (everyday) in my Wickeds pretty much sums up my love affair with them.

Okay, back to work and studying and work (and more studying). I’ll leave you with a couple tid bits…

  • If I had the money to burn, my next pair…would be the Silverlakes from The LA family (oh hell, since this is imaginary money, I would cop the Malibu knee highs as well) and prance around in short black dress with pewter accessories)!
  • The likely pair(s) for purchasePortsides from the On Course family because that’s some hardcore Mondrian goin’ on! I’ve wanted these for quite some time (and, they are Generalissima approved). Oh, and perhaps, a holiday present to myself – Rosyfrom the Hopeful family (my favorite color is blue for future reference)

Until next time, go vote, enjoy life, read a book (or two), be nice, and smile (a lot)!! 🙂

xoxo,

The Artful Voger (aka The Agent aka Dorothy)

Wickeds = Best.Boots.Ever


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50 by 50? countdown to halloween 2013

(Madam kindly asks, “Please gimme or find me size 6.5 in these Mollie Johnsons … Pretty please.)

“Uhm … You think something like twenty-three?! THAT’S CRAZY!!!” These were the words I yelped at a co-worker in November 2008 after I bought my second pair of Fluevogs. WTF?! Her friend owned 23 pairs of Fluevogs?!

Twenty-Six … In early May 2012, the last time I took inventory, I counted 26 pairs. It has been five months, and my MotleyFlue sisters (esp. Pusher) have asked for a current count. Indeed, I am past due, because the MotleyFlue’s Pusher and Agent where present during a few more additions to this Madam’s collection. However, not only am I past due, I am inspired by a few other reasons for taking inventory:

  1. Counting – November 6 is the soon-to-be-counting of votes for the Presidential election. I like math, and I am in a counting mood.
  2. Aging – I turned 49 years old last week (on Halloween, to be more specific) and have decided I will not shun my love for Fluevogs. Maybe I will garner 50 pairs of Fluevogs by 50 years old – who knows?
  3. Families – Inspired by Pusher’s the unofficial guide to understanding Fluevog families, I want to share what families I tend to more than others (at least so far).
  4. Friends – A Junior High School friend shared that she loves her pair of Operetta | Bartolis – her first pair of Fluevogs. She has plantar fasciitis and has read about how I have shared my Fluevogs (Operettas) are comfortable. She sent me a nice Facebook message, “… My feet Thank you.” To her, I say “Thank YOU for sharing! And I hope you enjoy wearing your Bartolis – For the Love of Vogs!”
  5. Annual Home Cure – It’s fall housecleaning time. When the clocks “fall back”, not only do I replace my fire alarm batteries but I also revisit Apartment Therapy’s The Eight-Step Home Cure. I trim down my closets, bookshelves, dresser drawers, cupboards, and I feed the OutBox (day 4 of the home cure).

Thirty-four … Indeed, I have 34 Fluevogs that I can don on my feet. I will share more in future posts about my collection.  Meanwhile, below are the Vogs I own, in order from the most recent acquisition to my very first pair – my fellowships | kathys.

Thirty-seven? … OH WAIT! as Pusher reminded me, not to be forgotten are three accessories – operetta clutch, eddie weekend bag, and silvana small bag.

Sixteen (or Thirteen) by Halloween 2013?
We shall see …
(p.s. I’m a size 6.5 with Vogs
ranging from sizes 6 to 7. Just saying …)

percy jr. ❤ … shirl


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current obsessions

I’ve been trolling ebay lately because for a while now, I’ve been dying for a pair of vintage Fluevogs with the heart heels. Oh Mr. Fluevog, why won’t you re-issue these? I know in 2010 the Vanny came out, but I didn’t really like the fit. I love the boots that came out with these heels. I found this post where the writer sadly shared that her shoes didn’t fit anymore and she was trying to sell them. Sigh. Look at these beauties. Me likey! Recently, I tried to bid on a pair of these on ebay. Unfortunately, my internet failed me and I missed the bidding window. (Lesson learned: Don’t try to be slick by placing a bid in the last 10 seconds of the window. You gotta give yourself at least 20 seconds!) The lucky winner scored a pair of these for only $68. Yay for the winning bidder. More sighs for me.

These are the Jolenes in lime green. Gorgeous! The image can be found here: http://twwly.com/2010/03/12/blessed-boys-and-sweet-shoes/.

There are several boots and shoes that come in the heart heel that are available on sites like ebay and the FlueMarket. I always troll with envy, as I’m looking for a great heart heeled shoe at the right size and the right price. (Btw. I usually wear a 9 in Fluevogs, but it can change depending on the style. To be safe, I think I’d have to get a size 9.5 in the heart heels.) Ahem. If you or anyone you know is looking to sell their heart-heeled shoes, feel free to contact me:)

Another obsession I’ve had are teal laces! This summer, when I was in San Antonio, one of the conference attendees wore brown CBCs with teal laces. I couldn’t stop looking at this shoes for the entire bus ride! While I’m sure the CBCs aren’t exactly my style, I’ve had the Radios on my wish list for some time now. These babies with teal laces… wouldn’t they be gorgeous?!

Okay. I need to stop obsessing. I just needed to let it out. So… what are YOUR current obsessions?! Please share in the comments section:)

Living life feet first.

j-ro